Monday 12 December 2011

Dear Santa (III),

I take your silence as confirmation.

Lots of love, Ally

1 comment:

Santa said...

Dear Ally,

Apologies for the delay with this reply. As you can imagine, the run up to Christmas is extremely hectic in my line of work. The demands and pressures put on me during this time of year is quite frankly overwhelming.

I'd like to think that, despite all the stress I'm currently under, I do understand what you are saying (though the whole food shopping explanation only resulted in me feeling hungry and the Mrs. getting angry that I hadn't had breakfast as she had suggested and thus ought to go hungry until dinner!).

Still, the time has now passed to put in requests and at my last check, books were unfortunately not on the list of your things to wrap up. My elves might well be mistaken (poor dears are just as stressed as I am, if not more) but you might want to prepare yourself for some disappointment in case a book does not find its way under your tree.

A little spoiler though, to give you something to look forward to (I know you deserve it)... the presents that ARE on your list, will most likely help you forget the lack of books for quite a while. Trust me.

Off to try and liaise with NORAD now - technology is all nice and well but it causes so many issues! Last year they thought they were tracking me but instead, Dasher had separated from the group and gone solo and the device was on him. I received many letters from disappointed kids (and parents alike) who literally saw 'Santa' make a U-turn and bypass their houses. Granted, Dasher has been reprimanded and received no bonus this year but still, I feel awfully bad for those poor children. I am hoping this year there will be no technical glitches.

Hohoho and Merry Christmas!


P.S. I realize the BBC Frozen Planet program did a lot of damage to my image but I really do not much care. Since I do have a soft(ish) spot for you though, I will tell you the truth and swear you to secrecy on this. I know everyone thinks I live at the North Pole but that's just a myth. I did give it a try for a while but the older I get, the harder the cold is on me. So the truth is, I now reside in the Kilauea volcano on Hawaii. It's nice and toasty and whilst there are some people who do make the trek to see this stunning place, no one has recognized me yet. There you have it. Hope this clarifies a few things...